Pet Feeding Fanatic Gifts

"You keep impeccable time."

Dog lover

"Watch out, Simone's hangry - her stomach AND her throat are growling."

"Do you recall the exact moment the balance of power shifted?"

''Raining cats and dogs' is just a phrase, Alix.'

Epic Battles

'So this is goodbye then!'

"Odd, since neither of us overfeeds her by even the smallest amount."

"Is that all they taught him at obedience school? How to use a can opener?"

Another environmentally correct office product: The executive desk/organizer-fish ladder

"Alright, alright! I'll stop buying the cheap stuff, OK?"

Dog owner sees pet reading book, 'How to train your owner'.

Dog Sees Only Food

"I can't believe how much I love her. Just look at those sienna eyes and that adorable little nose. I honestly don't know how I'd survive without her." "He has food."

'He's a very superior dog. Even his fleas have pedigrees!'

Man's best friend - Man's worst friend - Man's only friend.

'Trouble is, he rubbed my nose in it'

"Give him one of these 3 times a day and tummy rubs as needed."

"Not really. I went on the green carpet just before we came out."

Free range cat food - mice running around the store.

"You know, there are also some people who should never have children, hint hint...."

After Hours in the Pet Shop.

'Doctor Cameron, how fast! In the bladder already!'

'May I have two containers - fish for my cat, meat for the dog...vegetables divided as follows, one-fourth for the cat, three-fourths for the dog, but no carrots for the cat - kitty doesn't like carrots...'

The Catkins Diet

"For this dish we'll need to sauté the onion with the week-old, moldy, ant-covered French fry over medium heat. Then, we lightly flash boil our dehydrated mouse..."

Polly want a cracker?

'Think he'll ever spring for the bowl?'

"Hah, good luck to them when they try to flush THAT!"

Cat steals food from owner who is distracted by feeding the dog.

''No, Ma,am', I said. 'I'm not taking anybody's pet pig for a walk in a baby carriage' and then she doubled my salary.'

Cat wakes up owner demanding to be fed.

'Does my tail make me look fat?'

"The insurance company needs to see the alleged piece of straw before they’ll process your claim."

"It's the first edition of 'How dogs know what their owners are bringing home for dinner'."