Pet Comedy Pillows

Armed dogs wait for hot dog vendor.

It is important to give your dog opportunities to play with people.

Knock on the door - dog stands up and shouts 'Beat it!'

"No no, I said sit!!"

'My bark may be worse than my bite, but I've got a whine that will drive you up a wall!'

'I wonder if they have any water filters?'

Dog looks perplexed as man has his head out the window taking in the beer smells.

"It get it – you're hungry."

'Hey Harry, you know you've been walking around with a biscuit on your nose for the last two hours?'

"Why, you little Shih Tzu."

'Table scraps, doggie-bag goodies, dropped hot dogs, the cat's dish of food and your master's slippers.'

Tell me again how aloof and independent cats are.

"The Bruins are down a goal. Do me a favor: Pretend you’re a Boston terrier."

"Parts of a dog" "Hears food drop" "Smells food" "Chews food" "Swallows food" "Digests food" "Moves toward food" "Signals for food" "Makes room for more food"

Rusty, not believing in God, seized his chance...

'Of course I'm being catty. How else do you expect me to act?'

"They're friendly, but they're also carnivorous, so remember that when you're called on to beg and roll over."

'You've made a powerful enemy'

"Fee-fi-fo-fum, I smell Thursday's gluten-free lasagna!"

"Oh, wow! Is that stunning or what?" "Mid-century classic. Should be in a museum. Let's pee on it." "Totally."

"I'm new here. How much do we leave for a tip?"

"You understand that they call you 'good boy' because they can't remember your name, right? They never forget my name, they care about me..."

"Do you recall the exact moment the balance of power shifted?"

"This paw has you meeting a lovely poodle, an enchantress who will win your heart... but look, here, this is telling me she's lousy with fleas."

'Just taking the dog for a walk, Dear.'

'I'll be glad when winter is over and he can start buryi8ng bones again.'

Fish with a human in a bowl.

His Master's Thesis.

'Oh, oh, a pack of dogs! Stand still amd maybe they won't notice us.'

Woman leaves dog in rain...he gets into a car to wait in the dry.

"I finally caught you... now what?"

"The article says there was a break-in at the museum last night. I don't suppose you know anything about that."

'...and remember, son, never throw up on an old carpet...wait until they get a new one!'

Cats at private view