Pet Care Apprentice Gifts

'No, Johnny - first you punch the airholes, and then you put in the hamster!'

'...I already have 26 cats, why not 27...'

"We can see through the troposphere, stratosphere, mesosphere and into all those distant stars up there in outer space... truly remarkable, huh, girl?"

"Foster failure"

Dog Walking Services

"I have to refill it everyday. He has a tendency to retain water."

"I'm beginning to think that buy one, get one free is not always a good thing."

'You learn how to make dough later. For now, you're on a knead-to-know basis.'

"She's a miniature."

"Cloning is an imperfect science."

"Tell Mrs. Pomeroy we've found the source of that strange hint of musk."

"I’ve heard of them barking at the moon, but never scatting at the sun."

Codepetdency Counseling: "He won't even sit on my lap anymore."

'They sure have small litters.'

"Man! That squirrel was jacked!"

'Daniel! How many times have I told you not to bury that in the back yard! I'm going to be late for work!'

'Hon, can you fill the dog's water dish?'

'Relax, sir. He's a Border Colie - smartest of all breeds!'

Industry and Idleness - The industrious apprentice a favourite, and entrusted by his master.

With Wally the hermit crab showing no signs of life, Shirley yields to her kids' pleas and performs mouth-to-mouth resuscitation.

Dog Food

'Now you know where you left your tools.'

'...and now, Doctor, if you have satisfactorily disinfected your hands,...

Taking goldfish for a walk.

"I'm sixty three in human years and the mother of octuplets. Again."

After bring your cat to work day, I ended up with 5 extra cats.

'I heard him mention your name, what does neutered, mean?'

"Relax, Dad... I'll put your toothbrush away when I'm done. I always do."

A butcher and his apprentice.

'Where did the little bird go?'

"Well yes, I was shorn by the apprentice, but I don't mind really: everybody has to learn somehow..."

Dog wearing a cone around his waist: 'Hemorrhoids.'

'Do you realize he barked all last night?'

"Your dinner's on the table and yours is under the table."

"Tom, did you forget to feed the pets tonight?"