Pet Bird Whisperer Pillows

"Thank God he's on the last chapter."

A man with a bird perched on his finger.

It is important to give your dog opportunities to play with people.

Bitchbark Canoe

Lady taking her little dog to the chemist with a cough

'Isn't that cute! They're thanking us.'

"Bark or stare? Always a tough decision. Bark? Maybe stare? Whimper? Maybe? Meanwhile, stare."

"Cheers! Well, this is exciting. I've never had a dinner date with a duck before." "Relax, honey. I'm just here for the bread."

"Tell me about this fear of couches."

'Personally, I don't like to play Fetch, but it makes him happy.'

Polly txt speak

"See? I told you changing his food would be traumatizing."

Police Feline Unit

'So far, I've taught him to fetch.'

"I'm expert at sniffing out blame."

Knock on the door - dog stands up and shouts 'Beat it!'

"Think of it as twenty one in human years. I'll take a bourbon and toilet water."

Children's Parties

'Well, it's your fault for wearing my slippers.'

'With 73 dog obedience books read between us, I think we must consider defeat.'

'I see! And, just how much will it cost if she is in season?'

"So, tell me a little bit more about this house training you mention on your CV."

"I want him to have the serenity to accept the things he can't pee on, the patience to pee on the things he can outside, and the wisdom to know the difference." "But I'll probably just take him to a trainer."

"Foster failure"

"What you call tricks I call humiliations."

'So what's it like riding in first class?'

"Sometimes ... I just want to run away."

Cat woman shopping for cats.

Licensed Therapist

"No no, I said sit!!"

'When he's happy he can cool the entire downstairs.'

Barks in code.

"Quick, start the car!"

"They think we're their best friend. Just play along with it."

"Oooh... Look, honey. Scarlet macaws! You know, they mate for life." "That's what you think."