Pet Bird Enthusiast Pillows

'Why are you so bloody cheerful?'

'The proliferation of bird watchers make me more and more self-conscious...'

"Pick me!"

"What's that? I asked for a teal lichen. That's a brown thread. Are you trying to upset me?"

"Finches, don't look now, but there's a creepy guy staring at our beaks."

'A burp or a fart, I can excuse, but throwing up a pellet of fur and bones? That's gross dude!'

"God, I hope no one asks me to sing."

"You've been so good to us all these years. Is there anything we can do to repay you?"

"When is my next parole hearing?"

Papageno from The Magic Flute

"For the girls—Kimberly, Caitlin, Lauren, Cindy, and Tracy. For the boys—Cameron, Christopher, Adam, Jeffrey, and Gregory."

"Okay, you both know the rules: no trash talk, no batting the other guy all over the house if he’s unconscious, watch the claws and nails..."

"He could have been the national bird, but that was a long, long time ago."

Polluted geese

"As a friend, I pray you rest in peace. As a dog, I really want to dig you up."

'Since I'm new here, let's start by clearning the air. You may have noticed that I'm short for a C.E.O. . .'

Canine Companion

"Now they're referring to us as ecology nuts."

Sign in tree from bird "next appearance 3:00 pm"

They try, but those crows can't make noises they used to. The lost caws!

'And when did you have your last owl movement?'

"Oh, yeah, that's the spot... just stay there... hurt so good... a little harder—yes! You are my hero, no kidding, I freaking love y-oooh..."

"Trust me, you're not ready!"

"This has nothing to do with you ... this is between us and the tree."

'Oh, really?... I'm actually more of a dog person.'

Knight feeding his kids.

'You know too much!'

"Just kick back and enjoy this. These are the nest years of our lives!"

Pigeon Little

" 'Grrr' is not a word."

'I know that bird feeder is guaranteed to be squirrel-proof, but I still think they are getting in there.'

How about going easy on the carbs

So you're a mocking bird...

'Son, it's time we had that little talk about ornithology and entomology.'

"Just one more question before I let you in...I can let you in...are you a cat or dog person?"