Pet Behavior Enthusiast Pillows

"Eddie, you are one hell of a mouse!"

"If dogs had cell phones... Hi, Carl. It’s me again. I know you’re just going out to the mailbox but I was wondering if you’re ever returning. What’s the rush."

'The Pied Piper routine has got to stop.'

"I dunno, looks like a trap."

"Will you be taking these home or chewing them right here?"

Frank was certain his Bird of Paradise mating dance would press all the right buttons with Margaret.

"I'm just going to ring the doorbell so I have a chance of a spot in the bed."

"Are there treats? Just grab the treats and get outta there!"

"Is that true, Charles? You leave your crap all over the house?"

'Doctor, I don't want to eat mouseburgers, I want to be normal like everybody else.'

"The painting and pillows were his idea. The scratches were mine."

Dog Obedience School: 'I think we're going to have our work cut out with this one.'

"Hey Neil, you wanna come hang out with us today?"

"Hey! There's a hair in my soup!"

"I'll take this one."

'Humans do it, why couldn't we? Instead of chasing food, we could breed it: It's all explained in my report...'

'...and I know exactly how to interpret his barks.'

"He may be neutered and declawed, but he's still dangerous."

Deer Crossing Traffic Signs You Don't Often See.

Dog Bar with Toilets.

Shepherd, Herder, Hunter, Thinker.

"So tell me more about the dog sitter."

Dog History

"Jerk." "Jackass." "Screw you." "Bite me."

'Dad, this is so cool: Next month is a Blue Moon month, with two full moons instead of one!'

"If you could live your life all over again, what dead animals would you roll in?"

"Would you mind moving to your doggy bed? I'd like to sit in my chair. I know you can hear me. Your book is upside down."

"When I go, I’d like my ashes dumped on top of a squirrel’s head."

'I suppose this means you won't be fetching my slippers anymore.'

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"It's mouseborn."

"Wait ... now I forgot what I was going to bark at you for."

'Harvey, I'm afraid the dog has the mailman intimidated.'

"OK, she's back. Just start slowly, and remember to ask her about herself."