Personal Growth Skeptic Gifts

"I'm overbearing, conceited and obsessed with status."

Others will fight for you

"I dunno, I guess I just don't believe in myself anymore."

"She's done it! The formula for work-life balance!"

Reach for the Star.

"Things are still a little rough for me, and occasionally I lose hope and get depressed—but I'm getting stronger every day."

"Teach yourself what you don't know you don't know."

Pinocchio's Second Realization

"Oh indeed I did: I went feral for a year when I was young. It taught me a lot about the world, but about myself too..."

"Try thinking about something else."

The Seven Dwarfs After Therapy

"I was young and cocky because I wasn't aware of my shortcomings. Now I'm old and cocky because I can't remember what they are."

Screen Time vs Book Time

Pony express. Pony express yourself. Pony express yourself so much he left.

"I'm TRYING to extinguish my ego, but I feel so CONSPICUOUS up here!"

'I try not to think big too often or I get terrible headaches.'

"Remember how I've always had a hard time asking for help?"

"You left your demons here last week."

"You're not the same pupa you were when we first met."

That party went well.

'This is too small. Get me a 12...How many times?! I'm a 10 or a 12 on top and a 12 or 14 on the bottom depending on the shop, the cut of the fabric, the ambient air temperature, and the rotation of Pluto...and we always try the 10 first capiche?'

'I think I just had an epiphany. How do I make it go away?'

'It must be a problem of interpretation. I've read this book DOZENS of times, and I keep winding up here!'

"You need to justify your own existence first."

Not thinking BIG enough: Nickel & Dime Bank.

'I'm into New Age. My new age is 26.'

After years of intense inner work, Bill finally got his life completely in balance. That's when he noticed the new loose thread.

"You say I can move mountains? Right now,it's all I can do to turn over a new leaf!"

"Serenity's cool and all, but when do we get to bliss?"

"Sitting here with you each day at sunset reminds me I have to get a job."

"I'm sorry, but you didn't recognize me as the Messiah when I had braces and glasses."

Congratulations on the new you!

"My inner child wants to have a playdate with your inner child."

"This is just SO like him. For years, I begged him to straighten up and fly right, and when he finally DID, it was right into a picture window!"

"And lastly, for my infinite perseverance, self-control and fortitude, I'd like to thank the Internet trolls."