Performance Seekers Gifts

Learning to Ski.

Butterfly Woman

"Just be yourself."

Ancient Racing

"An actor, you say? Guess you caught the acting-like-a-waiter bug."

Theatre Crowd

Bob's Driving School.

The Slug Replaces the Cheetah as the Fastest Animal on Earth.

"Listen Herb, once you become the boss and decide who gets a raise, then you can have a raise."

A breakthrough in the morning meeting

'What can I do to create a climate where things get done?'

Middle-aged guy spots an available convertible. The mating ritual begins.

Pipe Smoker of the Year Awards.

"My wife has always encouraged me... ...to quit this stupid dream and get a real job." ... "You have a wife?"

'Now will you pull over and ask for directions?'

'My new browser is so fast I have to take motion sickness pills.'

'Bring me some more power.'

A caterpillar is rowing itself along

"Alan had to work all night on his presentation....this is what 17 espressos does to him."

"An enormous amount of advanced engineering has gone into our latest models. That's not to say, of course, that an enormous amount of advanced engineering hasn't always gone into all our models."

'We just don't talk anymore, Gerald!'

Classic Autos: We have muscle cars for weaklings!

"Being my own boss sounds fun but I wouldn't be able to motivate myself."

Computer Controlled Car

'I'm looking for a job that satisfies my lust for power.'

'So, then.... you don't LIKE life in the fast lane?'

Glass Ceiling

"No, no - I'm just looking for a balance of power that corrupts in moderation."

"Are you sure he tested negative?"

'He's on a high carbohydrate diet,'

'Though we understand your feelings towards your automobile, we aren't able to approve your application to marry it.'

Robot about to eat a battery

'I told you I'd make you a star.'

Cow outboard engine

Truthfully, I'm just a frustrated insurance agent …