Performance Enhancer Critic Gifts

'I'm afraid we're going to ask you to take a urine test, David'

"Just be yourself."

"Bravo!"

Theatre Crowd

"Thank you, Mr. Mulvaney, but what we're really looking for is someone with talent."

'We just don't talk anymore, Gerald!'

"It's time for your performance review where I damn you with faint praise."

"Are you sure he tested negative?"

"Well yes, you're a worker, but I think we can both agree that you're not a hard worker now, can't we?"

West End Shows closing - box office piled high with boxes.

"'Article I. Section 9. Claus B. No title of nobility shall be granted by the United States' - we gotta change that."

'There are two men and a dog out there, and the dog is asleep.'

Welcome to the wonderful world of abstract mime.

Oligarchy

'I think the global banking sector, drunk on years of excessive bonuses, may need a little more than your 'very angry' T-shirt to make them toe the line.'

Trilby - 'Petits bonheurs de contrebande'.

'I'll give you this, Henderson - you're no worse than anyone else.'

'What's your usual response to criticism?' - 'Extreme surprise.'

Trapeze Artists

"Music has doubled my income..."

Hugo Chavez - A peace loving man.

Performance Management: "Jump!"

Tightrope Walker.

"I don't get it. Who doesn't love a circus?"

"How long has it been, Fenwick, since you weaseled your way into this corporation?"

"You're gonna love this guy's act. He's, like, 'not funny, funny, not funny.'"

"Why Bingo Sinclair is the world's greatest clown director"

Crossing the thin line into show business

'Your evaluation is based on what you do in the next 30 seconds. Go!'

"I've seen it performed many times, but I can't remember ever sleeping through it so peacefully."

"On the one hand your flexibility is good for the company. On the other hand the chiropractors' bills are not."

'Well done Flipper, you seem to be balancing your workload well.'

'Minimalism is fine in design, but not in work attendance."