Perennial Grumbler Gifts

Permanently Offended By Something

#Thanksgiving #Nofilter

The Cat's Alarm Clock

'What makes me mad, I was only a couple seats away from all the right answers!'

'Can I help it if she's a rotten teacher?'

Rodin's Irish Judge

Boring and unnecessary meetings

"The planet is all wobbly this morning."

'Quicker to cycle anyway, mate...'

"We saw some inspired lunacy, then had some uninspired Italian."

"Yes, you should have studied harder and no, you can't unsubscribe from 5th grade."

'I got a darn D-plus, and that's WITH cheating!'

"OK, now here comes the lava."

Man - 'This coffee tastes like mud!' Woman - 'It was ground this morning.'

'Mum! Mum!... My egg's gone all runny!'

'Why does the phone always have to ring when I'm out of the bath?!'

"This test wasn't fair! No way it's an accurate measure of what I know!"

Le Bolshie Chef.

'To be perfectly honest, I hate my job: I'm not really a morning person...'

'No, I'm still standing in this stupid line looking at the back of somebody's stupid head.'

"Another meeting?"

"The sooner they take you off vice patrols the better."

'This food is revolting. And such small portions.'

"Perfect weather,wounderful food...and it all distracted me from spending the whole day at my computer terminal!"

'We've figured out your problem. You're allergic to grapes.'

'Irritable bowl syndrome'

"Teaching's a joy until the first bell. Then the whole day's ruined."

"All done with winter, are we, dear?"

"If you are angry at being kept on hold, press 1, if you are furious press 2, if you are apoplectic with rage ..."

"Too sunny for you. Too dry. Whatever next?"

"Where's the snooze button on this thing?" "Meow! Meow! Meow! Meow! Meow! Meow!"

"Whoever invented the obituary page is a real jerk."

'D-plus? -- I demand a recount!'

'I hate Mondays!'

Supermarket Self Service Checkout