Perennial Grumbler Gifts

Permanently Offended By Something

#Thanksgiving #Nofilter

The Cat's Alarm Clock

'What makes me mad, I was only a couple seats away from all the right answers!'

'Can I help it if she's a rotten teacher?'

Rodin's Irish Judge

Boring and unnecessary meetings

"The planet is all wobbly this morning."

'Quicker to cycle anyway, mate...'

"We saw some inspired lunacy, then had some uninspired Italian."

"Yes, you should have studied harder and no, you can't unsubscribe from 5th grade."

'I got a darn D-plus, and that's WITH cheating!'

"OK, now here comes the lava."

Le Bolshie Chef.

"This test wasn't fair! No way it's an accurate measure of what I know!"

Can you tell me how to sue you for flunking me out of law school?

'Mum! Mum!... My egg's gone all runny!'

Man - 'This coffee tastes like mud!' Woman - 'It was ground this morning.'

'Why does the phone always have to ring when I'm out of the bath?!'

'To be perfectly honest, I hate my job: I'm not really a morning person...'

'No, I'm still standing in this stupid line looking at the back of somebody's stupid head.'

"Another meeting?"

'This food is revolting. And such small portions.'

"The sooner they take you off vice patrols the better."

"Perfect weather,wounderful food...and it all distracted me from spending the whole day at my computer terminal!"

"If you are angry at being kept on hold, press 1, if you are furious press 2, if you are apoplectic with rage ..."

"All done with winter, are we, dear?"

'D-plus? -- I demand a recount!'

"Teaching's a joy until the first bell. Then the whole day's ruined."

'I hate Mondays!'

'Irritable bowl syndrome'

"Too sunny for you. Too dry. Whatever next?"

'We've figured out your problem. You're allergic to grapes.'

"Whoever invented the obituary page is a real jerk."

"Where's the snooze button on this thing?" "Meow! Meow! Meow! Meow! Meow! Meow!"