Pension Purseholder Pillows

'You're right...It is our state pension.'

"What a tragedy... he still had two years of his super left..."

'The economy being what it is, we've had to make a few changes in your retirement plan. . .'

'I had considered a career as an offshore commodities broker specialising in securitised asset transfers but the pension wasn't as good.'

"Apparently over 50% of people never look at their pension plans!"

"People are looking for stability in pension arrangements..."

"You never actually own a pension pot - you merely look after it for the next government."

"Who do you like in the super bowl?"

'I love these senior citizen discounts.'

"If we take a late retirement and an early death, we'll just squeak by."

'Where's the petty cash?'... 'It's in the box marked Pension Fund.'

"I just learned that my golden parachute was not properly packed."

'Retirement is OK, but instead of looking forword to weekends, I'm working at McDonalds.'

Help!!! I've been kidnapped - Your Money.

Worker Rights and the Smoking Ban

"The industry has agreed to take the pensions dashboard off our hands. . ."

'When bad 401ks happen to good people'

Passing the Pension Time Bomb

"The pension crisis prompted me to consider alternative invstments. Like Roulette."

Star Trek-the Older Generation. . .

Retirement Issues

"Come on dear. It's getting late, and you have to be up early to collect your pension."

"I'm the ghost of your future retirement."

"He was just a year away from retirement."

'I re-invested what was left of my 401K into returnable pop cans. I figure by the time I retire I should have about three dollars.'

"The real trick will be enjoying retirement long enough before the Government goes belly up."

'Sorry I can't pay your pension until I see gray hair. . . Oh yes, and you also get disability.'

"My inner child just turned 62. Where's his money?"

"Walter Thruggins, My Life as a Pensions Adviser."

'At last you can put your feet up and concentrate on worrying about your pension.'

'Whether I work in the public or private sector, save my retirement benefits.'

'Congratulations. Your old bloated 401K is now valued as a lean, mean 199F!'

'I'm new here. What type of retirement plan do they offer?'

"If we want to get across our warnings about the dire consequences of not saving for a future then we need powerful dramatic message!"

'The money you've saved to last through your old age is gone and, h-hh-m...you're still here!'