Penny-pinching Scholar Gifts

"I don't know...seems like budget cuts have gone pretty far this year."

"Work hard. Save money. Work hard. Save money. Work hard. Save money. Work hard. Save money. Yay!!! I died rich!"

"We were able to retire 6 years early by canceling cable & eliminating anything fun."

Power/Expenditures

"Why not pay someone to clean out the gutters?" "Total waste of good beer money." And just like that, Gail became a widow.

"Years of penny-pinching really paid off. The price of copper just went up again."

Martin hated dining alone – but loved the savings.

"This is your great, great uncle Orlando. He was a great mathematician, but a little cheap. He always picked up the check at restaurants...but only to make sure the math was right."

"I can't wait to get home and insult my parents from a position of authority."

"And the Haves, you might say, are divided into the Gives and Give Nots."

"Is that a fixed-rate scowl or is it adjustable to the current interest rate?"

"Diversification doesn't mean hiding the money under the mattress, the sofa and 2 chairs!"

"He gave me a complete checkup form head to wallet."

"This company wants to make money, NOT spend money. Turning on the lights would go against our goal."

'I can't make ends meet, let alone justify the means.'

'The good news is these grades are not good enough for me to get into an expensive college.'

'I'm banking on gas prices going up this summer.'

"Spend every last penny. Leave money to my spoiled kids. Spend everything...leave everything..."

"We thought it would save us money if we bought you the wood, and you made your desk yourself."

'He went into shock when you presented him with the hospital bill.'

'Perk up. Just think of all that interest piling up at more than 5% per annum.'

"At least he went quick. Although not quick enough, I'm afraid. This discount coupon expired last month."

'I don't date them until they have a free bus pass - saves money on a night out...'

'I'm afraid there's no tax deductibility for 'A life wasted in fruitless search for fulfillment through the acquisition of meaningless wealth'.'

'I'm majoring in 'Business' with a minor in 'None Of Your Business.''

"They're flipping to see who pays for the meals!"

Economics 101. Now I understand why older people are said to be "over the hill," it's because they're leaving a mountain of debt behind them.

The J.A. Dooty, Booty University, School for Smart Asses.

"I guess I'll just sit here since I can't risk being seen wearing everybody's stuff. On a more positive note, I'm actually saving money."

Frugal four

'That gunsmith wanted an arm and a leg to fix my gun.I said i could fix it myself.'

The first straw

Clenched Purse

"Look at how much money we could save if we were homeless."

'I see you've been abroad again, Mr Pringle!'