Pearly Gatekeeper T-Shirts

"Yeah, Saint Peter here. I locked myself out again."

"Just one more question before I let you in...I can let you in...are you a cat or dog person?"

"All we have left is standing room only."

'I can't stand his 'holier than thou' attitude.'

"Your mom needs to know that you made it here OK, and your dad wants to know if you could use a few bucks."

"You're a physician? Let me ask you about a problem that I've been having."

To get past the gates of Heaven you have to now enter an internet style password

"Your PA isn't due up here for another 27 years. You'll just have to answer the questions yourself."

"Hey, there's a spare key hidden under this cloud!"

'I suppose technically you're right. But we still prefer not to think of it as a gated community.'

"It was just a near-death experience, but while you're here, would you help me with this computer?"

Man at Heaven's gate with different college letter than St. Pete

"Go on in. You're the first onslaught."

"Actually, I'm just the night manager here."

'I assume you have paper work to back up all these time travel business expenses.'

'I can't believe I locked my keys inside, again!'

'Yeah, Saint Peter here. I locked myself out again.'

"I don't care if you are the invisible man, sir, I can't let you in if you're not wearing a tie!"

'Do you have a reservation?'

Julia Childs combats a growing rabbit population

'I don't care who you have a note from!'

"Hold on—I forgot to stamp your hand."

Folsom Prison - A Gated Community

"I know it looks a little rough but we're having all the puffy stuff reupholstered this week."

BEWARE OF THE GOD.

Beware Of The Hog...

'It's a cease and desist order. States that we can't keep anyone out. It's based on the ruling: The more the merrier.'

'No way you're getting in here with THAT mustache!'

"There's a man here who wants to add insult to injury."

"I'm sorry, but Mr. Barclay is not putting up with people like you anymore."

Don't worry, you're fine - I'm just having with a latch. A-1 Gate Repair.

"It's a no-go area."

Heavens gate 'Please enter, Do not fear to tread'

"Private property." "Warning. We don’t forgive those who trespass against us."

"You had the most toys but you didn't win."