Gatekeeper At Heart T-Shirts

"All we have left is standing room only."

"It's a no-go area."

"Just one more question before I let you in...I can let you in...are you a cat or dog person?"

"You're a physician? Let me ask you about a problem that I've been having."

To get past the gates of Heaven you have to now enter an internet style password

'Someone come and mediate our argument about mediation!'

"Hey, there's a spare key hidden under this cloud!"

'I suppose technically you're right. But we still prefer not to think of it as a gated community.'

"It was just a near-death experience, but while you're here, would you help me with this computer?"

'Location, location, location.'

Doorman for the Three Little Pigs

Heaven Security Checks.

"Actually, I'm just the night manager here."

"Go on in. You're the first onslaught."

'I assume you have paper work to back up all these time travel business expenses.'

'I can't believe I locked my keys inside, again!'

'Yeah, Saint Peter here. I locked myself out again.'

'Do you have a reservation?'

Julia Childs combats a growing rabbit population

"I don't care if you are the invisible man, sir, I can't let you in if you're not wearing a tie!"

'Oh, yes-he popped the question alright-'Who's gonna win the cup?'

"Hold on—I forgot to stamp your hand."

'I don't care who you have a note from!'

Folsom Prison - A Gated Community

BEWARE OF THE GOD.

"I know it looks a little rough but we're having all the puffy stuff reupholstered this week."

Beware Of The Hog...

"Yeah, Saint Peter here. I locked myself out again."

'It's a cease and desist order. States that we can't keep anyone out. It's based on the ruling: The more the merrier.'

"There's a man here who wants to add insult to injury."

"I'm sorry, but Mr. Barclay is not putting up with people like you anymore."

Don't worry, you're fine - I'm just having with a latch. A-1 Gate Repair.

Heavens gate 'Please enter, Do not fear to tread'

"You had the most toys but you didn't win."

I can't see him - can I take a message?