Peacenik Gifts

The Evils of War.

What we need more of. . . Love plus Peace = A Uniting of America

"Behold the secret to happiness."

'I wouldn't say this wine's name is long, but it's continued on the bottle next to it.'

Lady taking her little dog to the chemist with a cough

"Your food didn't melt, young man... this is the soup course."

"Tell me about this fear of couches."

Butterfly Woman

Prize vegetables.

"Her first word was 'paparazzi'. "

'What do you want first - The bad news or the even badder news?'

"Just be yourself."

The Busy Gardener

Gender Equality

Blue Stockings - Woman revealing herself as author

"Everyone at Megadrug is committed to the benefits of spoken therapies, which is why we developed 'nitrazone' to enhance the experience."

"I see that he is growing as fast as your law firm."

"Is he talking yet? I was hoping he could help me with my new phone."

I like the Jets...I guess

"A wet winter, but we're making the best of it."

"Okay, now breathe another sigh of relief."

'Please tell me you're baby sitting?'

'What would your mum say if she saw you drawing all over the wall like that?'

"Don't worry, dear. You'll grow."

'I stay trim because of high metabolism. Theirs, not mine.'

"His first out-of-body experience."

"I spilled a red dot of paint, so I painted the whole room so you wouldn't notice it."

'So far, I've taught him to fetch.'

Self help acupuncture

"Frankly, now that he's an obnoxious teenager, I find it more and more difficult to muster the urge to protect him..."

'That's it then - I'll take the slinky high-heeled cocktail number in a 5 and the everyday workshoe in a 7...'

The Zoo.

Madonna of the Pukes.

"I'm afraid I can't green-light anything - you'll just have to pray."

Demure lady with gloves