Peaceful Ponderer Gifts

'I warned him that this was no place for a guy with inner-ear problems.'

"There's a time and a pace for everything."

"My mind is especially empty today."

'Don't fight it, Fred - Just go with the flow.'

'How come there aren't any peace heroes?'

'After deep meditation, I've concluded that money per se doesn't make you happy, but it helps!'

'Sorry to disappoint you, but I'm just a secular humanist who likes to be left alone.'

"Have you tried turning off your conscious mind and then turning it back on again?"

'Yes sir, Thoreau had the right idea.'

Fat Buddhist contemplating eating the dove of peace.

'I'm trying to become enlightened, but my stomach keeps growling and interrupting me!'

'Are you the dove of peace?' 'Yes. What the hell d'you want?'

WISDOM! WHILE IT LASTS!, 'Maybe the sign wasn't such a hot idea after all.'

'Well, you heard wrong -- Zen Buddhism doesn't have a Missouri Synod.'

Please Stay Back At Least Six Feet

A man standing in long grass holding a fishing rod

'Well, in my case, Muzak DOESN'T help with meditation!'

'Sometimes, in the stillness and warmth of an afternoon sun, I can almost hear interest compounding.'

'All religions claim to be peace loving, yet religious differences is a major cause of war?'

Fish sleeps while counting worms that jump over a fence.

'We have to move - they're putting in a cell phone tower up here.'

"I keep thinking it's Sunday."

"I keep thinking I can hear a hypersonic missile."

"Sitting here with you each day at sunset reminds me I have to get a job."

Crowded Ice Fishing

'... And some primitive cultures, believed that 'the great ones' modelled us from clay.'

'Things have really livened up down there since You introduced SEXUAL reproduction.'

The Philosopher Pine, or, The Eternal Optimist.

"Have you been playing dice?"

"Intelligent design...well, duh!"

'Oh, so now the ocean isn't GOOD enough for you?'

Sauce for the Goose

Freudian Bar & Grill...Jungian Pub: 'We can out drink those Freudians ant day of the week!...'And twice on Sunday!' ...'Yeah!' ... e

"When we're home, are we still aliens?"

'Half an optimist is an odd bird, Sarah.'