Patient Power Seeker T-Shirts

"I know you're just trying to be helpful, but why don't you let me decide where my acupuncture needles should go?"

"Today we'll be performing some much needed maintenance on Miss Trimbles weak pelvic floor."

"Listen Herb, once you become the boss and decide who gets a raise, then you can have a raise."

If these are your medications, what happened to the beads I bought?

"How long were you in the waiting room?"

Institute of Health next to Alternative medicine dept

'He taught me the importance of taking a walk each day.'

"My wife says she wants you to make me fit for purpose."

'Our health-care system - eat organically.'

"We'll get there when we get there!"

Exercise Bars

'Bring me some more power.'

"I'm prescribing a patch. It will dispense meds as permitted by your insurance company."

"The truth is, doctor, I've lost faith in Western medicine."

Stopping smoking at work had given Tim the energy to explore his creativity ... 'And I like to call this my dance of the fourth quarters 'profit and loss' account.'

Classic Autos: We have muscle cars for weaklings!

"That's good. Now extend the fingers and lose the attitude."

"I said remember those extra years we added to our lives by good clean livin'?"

'Do you think I need to eat less. Do you have a book you could recommend to tell me how?'

"Your driver will arrive in 4...9...17 minutes after three accidental loops around the airport."

An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of insurance forms.

'Please help mommy lose some weight. She gets grumpy when she's on a diet that's not working.'

'I'm looking for a job that satisfies my lust for power.'

"No, no - I'm just looking for a balance of power that corrupts in moderation."

'I don't get it! I've been exercising for six weeks now and haven't lost a pound.'

Gym. Instructor. Why do you want to learn kickboxing? I've always wanted to win a fight hands down!

'Does the gym have a motorized version of this cycle?'

'It's not my fault that I've developed habits that cannot be sustained.'

"I've run every test known to man, and it turns out you're allergic to medical bills."

"Now that you mention it, I have to admit, the daily grind IS starting to get to me!"

Glass Ceiling

"Go out and play. You can't just sit there watching wall all day."

No matter what I do, I still look more like a 'before' picture than an 'after' picture.

'I'm going to suggest increasing your level of activity.'

"Sure, you could make a good living in private industry, but believe me, you wouldn't be running any kingdoms."