Patient Shopper T-Shirts

Stand in the Q.

Sale on the same stuff as last week.

'She's so put together!'

"I think I've found the most comfy jeans."

"I can't decide. I'm having a brand identity crisis."

"Sorry sir - the self-propelling pencils have all just walked out..."

'These fit just right. Do you have anything too tight?'

'This is too small. Get me a 12...How many times?! I'm a 10 or a 12 on top and a 12 or 14 on the bottom depending on the shop, the cut of the fabric, the ambient air temperature, and the rotation of Pluto...and we always try the 10 first capiche?'

'They've certainly got designs on your purse!'

"Are you looking to accentuate or camouflage?"

'Rozlyn, that blouse is very cute! I think you should get it.'

'My diet seems to be working great! Do you have any less relaxed jeans?'

'French hypermarket' ' 5 English or less' till

"Everything's gone up."

"Amazing! It's the season of me!"

"Perhaps a cozy scarf to go with the hat?"

'C'mon! Speed it up! I've got a bottle of wine here that says it's meant to be drunk soon!'

Latest Greatest Fastest Computer...versus Good Enough.

Moses parting the waves and trolleys appear on the sea bed!

'She's on the trail of a pair of Jimmy Choo's.'

Cars follow the sign to the mall rather than the sign to the manger.

Ladies Fashions - "Money isn't tight - you are!"

We Never Look at Prices Shop.

SERMONS 'R' US - everything for the clergy.

"You might say I'm middle-of-the-road. I'd buy a fur coat but I wouldn't buy a Japanese fur coat."

'I went to see a personal shopper this afternoon. . . I thought I'd surprise you!'

Man on Stilts in a Market

'Do you have any relaxed fit jeans that aren't quite so relaxed?'

Fashion Mistake.

Mall of ages

'Just look'in'

"I often think of the 'Hereafter'. When I'm shopping I'm always asking myself 'What am I here after?'"

'Cool, a wheel. Now you can take me shopping.'

"I'm looking for something that the recipient will be too embarrassed to regift."

Complex Carbs