Pathway Punster Gifts

Straight Ahead / Whoopee

Tree house.

Kick Me! (sign on an anthropomorphized soccer ball)

"Igor, you fool! I said 'healthy brain'!"

'Tony can't come out to play now, he's on his orthodontopole!'

Standings: Milky Way Conference

Atlas working out with the earth as his exercise ball.

A-Hem! I'm still singing here!

"No, I'm not a hare, I just happen to have big ears..."

"Sorry, I can't - I have to be everywhere."

'Its a dogwood tree. I can tell by its bark.'

Molecules You Ought To Be Aware of:

Theater on meds

"Yes, sir, it's Houstonia Michauxii and it prefers shade or semi-shade."

...Isolated clumps of strange matter pop briefly out of the quantum foam to debate the possible existence of particle physicists.

'I don't mean to discourage you, but go home and play on your own range.'

Sure, Jupiter's the biggest, but I hear he uses Asteroids to build up his bulk!

They just found two more dark moons around Uranus. Are you winding up to some sort of sophomoric joke? No, they really do think they found two new moons there. Kind of suspicious, if you ask me. As long as I can remember, Uranus had 27 moons, and the Solar System had 9 planets, including Pluto. Now those numbers change all the time. Next thing you know, they'll be telling us we have to Uranuses. Yeah ... pretty sure you're winding up to some sort of sophomoric joke.

'If you want to improve your golf score, the best wood to use is a pencil with an eraser.'

'My mom says an apple a day keeps the physician's assistant away.'

'Hey, Lady, this is a sixty zone!'

How the planets of the solar system are known to their friends

'Pretend you don't notice San Andreas.'

Give Chlorophyll.

I'm afraid I can't write you a prescription for medicinal seaweed.

Stay at Home Yellowstone.

'Trust me. He's far more effective than any drain cleaner and he doesn't contain any environmentally dangerous toxins.'

Surfin' the web.

Mobile Holmes.

'I have a rasp in my throat.'

Timmy Gets Solitary.

The Stand-up Petrophysicist...

Lawyer Xing

'He's a nice guy, but those tectonic plates of his really weird me out.'

'I don't understand why they make such a big deal about acid rain. Can't we just counteract it with alkaline rain?'