Patents Officer T-Shirts

Patents Officer.

'The wheel was great, but what have you done for me lately?'

'Williams, we're not used to receiving such excellent ideas as these, so we'd like to tone them down a bit.'

"Actually, she's just a figurehead boss. Our real CEO is an algorithm floating around somewhere in the cloud!"

"What's a patent?"

'Ted, I really wish you'd update your presentation software so we could do away with the 3-D glasses.'

'Yes, sir, what can I do for you?'

Patent Attorney (invisible man)

"I'm Necessity and this is my son, Invention."

The man who invented the wheel/The man who patented the wheel.

"I've added an additional response to the doc's health questionnaire. It's called 'Mind Your Own Business.'"

"I'm naming you VP of Revolution, Action and Edgy Thinking...on one condition...that you promise not to change anything."

'Great idea, Philpott. Wish you'd thought of it.'

'I'm afraid this new self you reinvented has already been patented.'

Joe's Bar: Not Responsible For Lost or Stolen Intellectual Property.

Patents office.

"We think your telephone is a great invention, Mr Bell, but is a bit basic. How about adding a phonograph to it?"

'Apparently, the next guy has invented a time machine!'

Academics at the Beach: Professor Stints wears his patented total sun-blocking suit.

'They never let you forget that your intellectual property belongs to them.'

Money Tree

'It's okay, they're with me.'

'Dear sir, thank you for your idea of a helicopter ejection-seat, but...'

'He's a real stickler for punctuality. He got really annoyed when I was late for an appointment, next week.'

August, 1897 - Arthur Eichengrun invents aspirin.

Patent Office: ". . . It's a phoneless cord."

Man sees Creative License Bureau

Don't look know, but I think you're being Googled.

'Invasion of privacy.'

"Here's my wallet, my phone, the key to the safe and an application form for your so-called 'mind control device.'"

Patents office

"But you both can't be the 'father' of Ammonium Pentoxide Phosphate."

"I'll need to see your responsible service of alcohol certificate."

The night they invented champagne.

'Quit if you want, Bowman, but the intellectual property stays here.'