Passive-aggressive Aficionados Pillows

"I don't have the energy to argue. How 'bout we slip into something comfortably passive-aggressive?"

"How to talk to people" "Make them rue the day"

"It's not the paranormal activity that bothers me so much as the passive aggression."

"Open a wine that will make me want to watch the shows you want to watch."

"I speak Latin, you know."

'It's okay if don't want to give us control of your company. We're perfectly capable of living with incredible disappointment.'

A couple holding hands

Pension in race with tortoise and snail.

'Of course business is slow. Would we want it any other way?'

My Gay Son Never Calls

Mothers Without Borders

"Personally, I wouldn't have a problem with a nanny state."

Speed Checked By Radar.

"Guess how long it's been since I've had a salary increase."

Whatever

"Just a heads-up... when you count calories, high score doesn't win."ories/high score

"When do your in-laws leave?"

"Whoa, whoa, whoa, lady, can't you read?"

"I'm ot saying you're fired Ed, but I'm also not saying where I hid your desk."

How to appear more interesting.

"Can I bring you something else to complain about?"

Eve's Mom

"You spoil that child!"

Over the years, Sid had refined travel on the path of least resistance to a fine art.

Hippie Army Knife

"There's a math book in your lunch bag?"

'Near as I can understand, my folks come from Kansas, and the stork brought me.'

'You've heard of Tiger, Bear and Shark...... meet the snail!'

Trial Balloons in Apartment 3-B

"Are you still mad at Phad for bumping your car?"

Tortoise having his shell checked by Customs.

Warning: This car is protected by powerful anti-squeegee devices.