
"Good news, Turner, We've chewed you up but have decided not to spit you out."
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"Good news, Turner, We've chewed you up but have decided not to spit you out."
"Our new associate asks how much of a fee is too much. Do you want to handle this or shall I laugh in his face?"
I love Lawyers
"Bailiff."
"Not guilty but prepared to settle out of court, your honour."
The Jose Padilla Experience
"Gimme a 'D'! Gimme an 'N'! Gimme an 'A'!"
"Mr. McMurdo has been called 'guilty as the day is long.' And yet, do not biblical scholars tell us a day can mean many things?"
"I've learned something in this trial. My firm needs to hire that prosecutor."
"Never mind what I did, Your Honor. I want to be judged for who I am, as an individual."
"Objection! Pummelling the witness."
"Just one more outburst and I can have this chicken tenderized."
"Before the defense rests, my client would like to read you a little sonnet he composed about his love for the jury."
"And finally, I implore the jury not to take my clients lack of alibi and blatant lies out of context."
'Your honor, I'd like a short recess so my client can make a run for it.'
"I must protest, M'Lud. Prosecurity counsel is blantantly attempting to wheedle the truth from the accused."
'I couldn't help noticing that nobody swore YOU in!'
'No, you weren't there. But in your expert opinion as a certified brainiac, do you think he did it?'
'Your Honor, we've finally agreed on a verdict.'
'He started it!'
"Let me tell you, folks—I've been around long enough to develop an instinct for these things, and my client is innocent or I'm very much mistaken."
"I really wanted to get you off but I didn't want to make a mockery of Justice."
Jurors saying 'I'm on the jury' on their mobiles.
"May I treat him as a hostile lawyer?"
"Twenty five years! But your honor,
'You were convicted by the jury, but at least you were acquitted by the media.'
"That settles it. I'm moving for a retrial."
"Apparently, you have very little respect for our judicial system, sauntering in here with only one lawyer."
"I object, Your Honor! This line of questioning is really weird."
"Excellent! It's the disclosure documents for your hearing on Monday."
"This jury may not be swayed by any defense that relies on emotion."
Two lawyers in a royal court
'I believe my trainee is putting together the trial bundle for you now.'
"One soft drink and eleven stiff drinks."
'I'm worried since he was chosen jury foreman.'
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