Parsnip Aficionado Pillows

"I just said that his parsnip wasn't orange enough."

Tartine

"Thanks to the Oscars, we're going to be the hottest finger food this season."

'My body has rejected every diet I've tried.'

Rage.

He's in training for the rugby World Cup.

Cat Heaven vs Mouse Hell.

"I just want you to know that promotion, this office, and those Luna bars were mine!"

"I'm not eating cookies before dinner. I'm having cookies for dinner!"

Love is when you watch television together.

'Take of the fruit and eat . . . Well, peanuts actually.'

I put a picture of my lunch on Facebook, and nobody hit "like." Who doesn't like Slim Jims and beer?

"I come here for the pepper."

'At least he isn't into drugs.'

Budget Bureau. Ernie, spilling something from every food group on it, does not make it a "balanced" budget!

Lioness Shops for Snacks.

How The Sausage Is Eaten

"Funny. My girlfriend said the same thing."

"Note the spike here, when the state legalized marijuana."

'These hors d'oeuvres are real slop, and I mean that in the best sense.'

"We'd better stock up on TV snacks in the event of war."

Cheese

'You'll enjoy our staff meetings. We always begin and end with the product.'

'I see you're still trying to get the staff enthused over the weekly meetings.' (Meeting offers free coffee, free snacks, eye-popping charts, exciting videos and free idea pads).

Sign at vet's says 'Cat's waiting area'. Cat says to dog with head in cone: 'Oi, mate, can't you read?'

"Freshly ground pepper?"

Medical Marijuana Dispensary / Medical Cheez Doodles Dispensary

Pope tarts.

"We serve danishes because that's just how I roll!"

"Goal!"

"The best thing about this, is the lovely honeycomb centre."

'Just look at him. The face that lunched on a thousand chips.'

"Fresh pepper spray?"

Sheltering in place.

Supermarket - World Cup Specials