Parents Of The Couple Pillows

'Your parents wrote this prenup stating you two will stay together at least long enough to justify your costly wedding.'

"I was with you right up to the cumin."

'Isn't that cute! They're thanking us.'

City Zoo: Day Care

"Bond James, Bond."

"Together ideas for couples" "Slap a sandwich together" "Put two and two together" "Pull themselves together" "Rub two sticks together" "Try to hold it together" "String a phrase together"

"See? I told you changing his food would be traumatizing."

Grace For Flies

Grad School Parent-Teacher Conference

I like the Jets...I guess

'Why don't they make thumb-flavored baby food?'

'Personally I take all these programmes with a pinch of salt.'

"I spilled a red dot of paint, so I painted the whole room so you wouldn't notice it."

'Are you finished eating yet, sweetie?...Guess that answers THAT question!'

"They grow up so fast."

It's a Whole Field of Paisley!

"I know what this is, it's what mum and dad call 'working from home'...

Children's Parties

Madonna of the Pukes.

"This is a great spot to practice mighty roars son..."

"Someone once told me that kids grow up so quickly. I hope there's some truth to that."

"Stephen and I are today's special."

You can't just switch them. If your wife asked you to change the baby, she probably meant the diaper.

"I can't protect you from everything, but I can read you stories that make you believe I can protect you from everything."

Cry babies.

"I'm sure you'll grow into it, darling."

"I think the most rewarding part of caring for elderly parents is when they call you because they don't want to bother the 9-1-1 people."

'I don't want him experiencing anything until I've totally checked it out.'

'I think the salmon is thoroughly smoked.'

'I've had some baby sized clubs made.'

Santa Claus's Mail

"There was no other choice, Mom. It was a double dog dare."

'Ahhh...'

Catching Jeffrey To Change His Diaper.

'I told you it would be useful.'