Parenting Appreciator Gifts

"I'd like to thank my parents and my creditors for making this possible."

"You're fatigued, run down, anxious, with high blood pressure, back ache, and a general malaise. You've got kids."

Judge, jury and executioner.

"Someday when you have a kid of your own and you feel the urge to arbitrarily say no just because you can, you'll understand."

"...My daughter, the model..."

"And this is Joshua, he'll be a hundred and forty-seven months next week."

'Daddy's busy - Go draw on the wall.'

She's good, but Mom's better.

"Oh my, you're a dirty little weasel, aren't you darling?!"

'What I like most about my mom is that she always supersizes her hugs.'

'Hey Mum, look what I caught!'

"This is humiliating. Couldn't you drop me a block from school?"

"Very impressive. Leave it with me. Mommy will get back to you by the week."

'I don't resent taking orders from a woman... for 20 years I took them from my mother.'

"I'm not surprised that it's a bad school report. Statistics indicate that children get their intelligence from their fathers!"

'Look Mummy: I've pu on my shell all by myself...'

"Today you're an ugly duckling, but one day you'll turn into a gawky adolescent duck."

'It seems like only yesterday that Sharon was knee high!'

Ask your mother.

'Ms. Evertz, has my mother been snooping around my office again?'

'Oh no, I put Rusty out. But man! I have an awful stomache ache! I think I need ice cream....separate bowls.'

"Just dropped by to do my groceries."

'It's a little read book... the sayings of charwoman mum.'

If they get rough, use the playpen. Get inside and you should escape injury.

'Did you know that our lawn is astroturf? I think our parents must be total psychos.'

Parental Valentines Day Cards

'I don't think your dad likes me, Angie.'

A father pushes his baby on a swing