Parenthood Observer Gifts

'They are so Ugly, yet their babies are still adorable.'

What did I tell you about covering your bottom when you sneeze?

'Sure, go ahead! Evolve! It's all the rage, I know! Have fun! I'll just sit here in this murky, primordial soup with nothing but plankton for company. Why should you stay here with your mother? The one who raised you, fed you...'

"You're not the same pupa you were when we first met."

"It's so nice to finally put a face to the name."

"Sorry, that was just the wet diaper talking."

"Were we expecting a baby?"

"It's his emotional support animal."

"Yeah, you could say I've got mother issues....she told me I have to move out!"

'And when your mother said that you would never be an Olympic gymnast, how did that make you feel?'

What are we doing today? Installing raised beds. Then we'll plant them for a couple who want organic vegetables. Brilliant, Dad. Tree's Tree Nursery. You take the hard work out of gardening. Right. And give it to me! Right again!

'We're doing the right thing, Bob, Let Andy solve problems with bullies at school his own way,,,'

'Hey Mum, look what I caught!'

'And you're sure you handed the baby to me?'

"My inner child feels threatened by my inner baby."

"Attention, wanna-be son-in-law ... we're losing!"

"Mom, are you sure I'm not adopted?"

'Mom says she has a souffl

"So this is the Mr. Waring who has made such a great impression on my little girl."

Origins Of Evolution

"Funny, I don't remember signing up for this."

"That sister of yours sure has some nerve asking for those leftovers - we earned them."

'You're due in September, however, since you're not mentally ready, let's make it October!'

'Simple case of gravity, mom.'

I think it's time he left home.'

"If it slows down, just ask my father about the murder he always swears he did not commit."

"Weeds are like kids. They grow up so fast."

"Mom said mopping up my snow tracks is a good start for my bucket list."

"I needed a gig to tide me over between baby booms."

"Really? After all these years of you begging me to let you come and howl at the moon, now that you're a teenager, it's not cool to be seen with your dad!"

'Male, 38, still living with his parents. They asked us to keep him overnight, so they could change the locks.'

'We've never had an accident - aside from three of our five kids.'

"I need a more interactive you."

"You're six years old and I'm your mother! - I'm SUPPOSED to impose my moral standards on you!"

'WOW, congratulations, Ma'am! You're having Quads!'