Parenthood Dreamers Gifts

Mr. & Mrs. Stickfigure are expecting twins.

'Hi hon! How's the little monster?'

Baby pram as a tank

'Congratulations! You've just downloaded a baby boy.'

"It's so nice to finally put a face to the name."

"Sorry, that was just the wet diaper talking."

"Were we expecting a baby?"

'Congratulations! It's a bouncing baby boy!'

'And when your mother said that you would never be an Olympic gymnast, how did that make you feel?'

"I hear you may do a baby."

The Impractical Guide to having a baby.

'Hey Mum, look what I caught!'

'And you're sure you handed the baby to me?'

'How many fingers do you see?'

"Funny, I don't remember signing up for this."

'Mom says she has a souffl

"My inner child feels threatened by my inner baby."

'Trust me, the term 'blissfully pregnant' is an oxymoron.'

'You're due in September, however, since you're not mentally ready, let's make it October!'

'He takes after your mother' (colour)

"Really? After all these years of you begging me to let you come and howl at the moon, now that you're a teenager, it's not cool to be seen with your dad!"

"We're looking forward to this little bundle of joy bringing out the worst in each of us."

"I needed a gig to tide me over between baby booms."

"Weeds are like kids. They grow up so fast."

Woman Window Shops For A Baby Book

'Male, 38, still living with his parents. They asked us to keep him overnight, so they could change the locks.'

'We've never had an accident - aside from three of our five kids.'

IVF assessment centre.

"You're six years old and I'm your mother! - I'm SUPPOSED to impose my moral standards on you!"

Maternity Ward: No Returns/No Exchanges

'Our computer responds to voice commands, but our kids don't.'

'WOW, congratulations, Ma'am! You're having Quads!'

'Ted, you won't climb the corporate ladder if you keep taking paternity leave!'