Parental Patience Pros Gifts

"It's just a phase."

"Congratulations, it's a lifetime of penury and countless sleepless nights!"

"Well, I had 'the talk' with him.

'He's the one who needs obedience training!'

"My kid's a holy terror... no offense."

'Change is inevitable, espeically when you have a newborn in diapers."

"That is one absorbent nappy."

Armed forces waiting with nothing to do.

"Another reckless baby driver! I'd arrest the whole lot of them if they weren't so damn cute."

"Ah...here they are!"

"Instead of taking a bath couldn't I just run through a carwash?"

"I'm the last to go home because my parents are still fine tuning their work-life balance."

'This is Tyler; he's mommy's precious little feral-angel.'

"If you find authority intolerable, remember, you're in good company."

"No, I don't look in the mirror. I look in the soap."

The modern generation!

"It's difficult to attract a younger customer when our main demographic is babies."

'At midnight, we go over the wall.'

Toilet Training

'I changed my mind...I'm not thirsty anymore.'

'But I'm not tired yet!!!'

'Sorry, he can't come out and play. He's grounded.'

'He's my personal potty trainer.'

'Hi, honey?we're home!'

"This is our most practical model. It comes with a 21-year warranty."

'Excuse me mom, I've got to take a call.'

'My sales training was right. The person in the highest chair is dominant.'

Toy Store/Battery Store

"Don't hit him too hard, his little old mum's at the ringside!"

"My mom got it on. She said you'd get it off."

"Going to the beach with kids Sand in eyes, food, crevices Chasing after them with sun cream Frantically checking they haven't been kidnapped or swept out to sea Enjoying it"