Parent Patience Master Gifts

'Can you say 'try the patience of a saint' in a note from a public school?'

"My kid's a holy terror... no offense."

Armed forces waiting with nothing to do.

"But this time, Lucky, when I throw the ball... you bring it back!"

"No, I don't look in the mirror. I look in the soap."

'I'm ready! You ready?...You ready?'

'His next appointment is on the 17th when the clock's little hand is on the two and the big one's on the nine.'

'Excuse me mom, I've got to take a call.'

"I think my Harry must be practicing some sort of Tantric fishing. He'll be at it for hours and not catch a thing."

"Your call is important to us. Your estimated wait time is less than five hours."

"I just called to say I love you, but come to think of it - can I borrow some money?"

Women

'You wouldn't believe how hard it is for me to unwind after work.'

'Why are you so obnoxious?' 'Heredity!'

Road work next 15 years.

'This is wonderful. It will help millions of people.'

A knowledge of where the fish are likely to be located can save hours of frustration.

Due to higher-than-usual caller volume, your wait-time is nine minutes. That's over an hour in wolverine minutes.

"I'm too old for baby limas."

'I like to spend my train journeys reading fiction.' (He looks at Rail Timetable. Sign says 'Delays expected'.)

'Sure, long waits don't bother you. You've served time.'

"Don't worry, it gets easier when they're 35."

'I DID work out today, doc. Sitting all afternoon in your waiting room was a real exercise in frustration!'

"Juding by your expression, your mom made kale for dinner."

"I'm not doing this because I like it. I'm doing this because I love you."

"I've had it with the nineties!"

Driver being taught by impatient parent

"He's beginning to find that homeworking is much harder than he thought."

office noise

'You couldn't just lock him up somewhere, could you?'

'Waiting for...'

"As a child, Timothy would often test his mother’s patience."

"Done already? Wow!" "Yup, a new record. Just under two years."

Taxi in congestion - Thank you for not getting out and walking

"Then again, in some extreme cases, a swift kick in the pants is called for!"