Parental Multitaskers Pillows

A little boy is crawling through a sandbox towards his mother as though he were dying of thirst in a desert.

Handbag: But You Have Kids and a Dog/But Have Kids

Believe it or not: Once upon a time Dads couldn't even boil water.

"Your resume says that you've got your Ph.D., your M.B.A. and that you've worked as a C.F.O. and C.E.O. but that your most important title and position has been M.O.M.?"

"The problem with these instructions is that they assume I have the attention span to actually read something."

Fitness Programme for babies

"I'm eating baklava through my balaclava!"

"I'll have to put you on hold. I have a bite on the other line."

"I was finishing my homework in the shower to save time!"

"Let me put on my 'working' head."

'How soon can I return to work? About fifteen minutes ago.'

"We are extremely short-staffed here and you would need to be okay with that. For example I’m the janitor, but I also do interviews in between emptying trash cans."

Cocktail party with man balancing drink on head as he eats.

"I'm returning home triumphant - do you need me to pick anything up?"

Man walking a dog is passed by a runner carrying a baby on her hip.

Soccer kids texting

'It's an audio book: I'm too busy to read books...'

Studying and technology

Mom simultaneously feeds baby his bottle, and husband his.

Homeschooling

"You wouldn't believe how many patients he sees in a single day!"

Having It All

"These days I do a little sub-editing on the side too!"

"Okay, I'll change your diaper, but you better not tell any of my patients."

"What?!"

"...I've only got four pairs of hands you know"

'I spent today with out spindoctor, and boy, am I dizzy.'

'Who's gonna tell her she's wearing two different shoes?'

'So you could say 'I'm wearing two hats'.'

'I'm a communication expert because I can eat crisps, drink beer, read the news and talk to my wife while watching TV!'

'I don't have time to read a book a month, what about a pamphlet club?'