Childhood Multitasker Pillows

"Drunk, yet orderly"

Fitness Programme for babies

"Your resume says that you've got your Ph.D., your M.B.A. and that you've worked as a C.F.O. and C.E.O. but that your most important title and position has been M.O.M.?"

"The problem with these instructions is that they assume I have the attention span to actually read something."

"Can I multi-task? As a single mom I'm both the bread-winner and bread-baker!"

Hassled Mother.

"I was finishing my homework in the shower to save time!"

"Let me put on my 'working' head."

Creative entrepreneur at work

'How soon can I return to work? About fifteen minutes ago.'

'I suppose you realize that when I tell everyone back at the office about this you wont be able to tele-commute anymore.'

Handbag: But You Have Kids and a Dog/But Have Kids

Cocktail party with man balancing drink on head as he eats.

"We are extremely short-staffed here and you would need to be okay with that. For example I’m the janitor, but I also do interviews in between emptying trash cans."

A little boy is crawling through a sandbox towards his mother as though he were dying of thirst in a desert.

Mom simultaneously feeds baby his bottle, and husband his.

Homeschooling

'It's an audio book: I'm too busy to read books...'

"These days I do a little sub-editing on the side too!"

Having It All

"Okay, I'll change your diaper, but you better not tell any of my patients."

'I spent today with out spindoctor, and boy, am I dizzy.'

"Hey. Where the hell's my harmonica?"

"What?!"

'Who's gonna tell her she's wearing two different shoes?'

'I'm a communication expert because I can eat crisps, drink beer, read the news and talk to my wife while watching TV!'

'So you could say 'I'm wearing two hats'.'

Piano eight hands.

"I'm your court-appointed attorney, but I'm really an interior decorator."

"Day care worker's delight: Velcro diapers"