Parental Coach Pillows

"Your dad sure worries a lot."

"Now, remember, act cute."

Thunk! Teddy! Pick them up! They're toxic to all living things! Ok. Ok. But you don't have to exaggerate. Regrettably � I'm not.

"Can I borrow the car keys?"

'Sometimes I worry that I basically wasted my 2's.'

'Why don't they make thumb-flavored baby food?'

“She’s in her abstract expressionism phase.”

'I don't want him experiencing anything until I've totally checked it out.'

"Look Mommy, hat!"

"That's not how I sat on you."

"My kid's a holy terror... no offense."

A kangeroo and it's baby read books about understanding each other.

The best PE teacher in the World.

"Your mother and I are feeling overwhelmed, so you'll have to bring yourselves up."

We're looking for someone who knows how to adapt, not adopt.

My 5-year-old nephew cut his hair! His mom was so upset until she thought: 'Wait a minute! I just saved 12 bucks!'

'I'm not spoiled - I always smell like this.'

"I won it for being the most noncompetitive in preschool."

"How many times have I told you kids to hang your coats in the closet?"

"What do you mean it's not 'Thong Thursday?'"

"Mom, can you come get me?"

'Why did the chicken cross the road?'

"That's nice, but do you have any references other than your Mom?"

'Do you have any books on controlling little monsters?'

'Never underestimate the value of pipe-dreams, my son.'

'Your parents are way too overprotective.'

Mom's Diner/Mom's Desserts

Parenting Business Deals

"I told my mom either the sitter goes, or I go!"

Icarus, you are not flying anywhere until you put on some sunscreen.

"Some day you'll look back at this and remember me as the person who taught you to fear water."

"Be afraid to try new things!"

'But, Mom, being good just doesn't work for me.'

Mother pushes twins on a double-decker swing.

'The best way to teach my son is by example, you know: Monkey see, monkey do...'