Paranoid Eater Gifts

Searching for a fun gift for the paranoid eater? Explore our collection of clever, relatable products designed to bring a smile to anyone who’s overly cautious about their food choices. Perfect for those who love humor with a dash of personality, our items feature playful designs that make fun of the cautious eating qualities everyone knows (or fears!). Brighten their day with something that celebrates their unique food safety obsession.

All Products Prints T-Shirts Mugs Pillows

"The penicillin looks good."

from $19.00

'Be honest. Does this double bacon cheeseburger with large fries and shake make me look fat?'

'Be honest. Does this double bacon cheeseburger with large fries and shake make me look fat?' mockup

'Be honest. Does this double bacon cheeseburger with large fries and shake make me look fat?'

from $19.00

The Government's Got Your Back. And Wants Your Front As Well.

The Government's Got Your Back. And Wants Your Front As Well. mockup

The Government's Got Your Back. And Wants Your Front As Well.

from $19.00

No Immediate Danger

from $19.00

"The salad should be delicious. We ordered it with lots of extra bacon bits."

"The salad should be delicious. We ordered it with lots of extra bacon bits." mockup

"The salad should be delicious. We ordered it with lots of extra bacon bits."

from $19.00

"Please don't kill me."

from $19.00

Trust

from $19.00

Conspiracy Theory Bookstore: JFK, Princess Di, and Osama Bin Laden.

Conspiracy Theory Bookstore: JFK, Princess Di, and Osama Bin Laden. mockup

Conspiracy Theory Bookstore: JFK, Princess Di, and Osama Bin Laden.

from $19.00

Conspiracy Cat

from $19.00

"If it's nothing serious' why did you put on five pairs of gloves?"

"If it's nothing serious' why did you put on five pairs of gloves?" mockup

"If it's nothing serious' why did you put on five pairs of gloves?"

from $19.00

'Hello, Ebeneezer! It's me - the ghost of coming dinner!'

'Hello, Ebeneezer! It's me - the ghost of coming dinner!' mockup

'Hello, Ebeneezer! It's me - the ghost of coming dinner!'

from $19.00

Hypochodriac worrying about his heart. mockup

Hypochodriac worrying about his heart.

from $19.00

The Nervous Gourmet:Low-Risk Chicken mockup

The Nervous Gourmet:Low-Risk Chicken

from $19.00

'I checked my symptoms on the internet and I think I might be dead!'

'I checked my symptoms on the internet and I think I might be dead!' mockup

'I checked my symptoms on the internet and I think I might be dead!'

from $19.00

'The computer can talk to terminals all over the country. Bentley thinks it's talking about him.'

'The computer can talk to terminals all over the country. Bentley thinks it's talking about him.' mockup

'The computer can talk to terminals all over the country. Bentley thinks it's talking about him.'

from $19.00

"When it's extremely cold out, I prefer flambés to winter stews."

"When it's extremely cold out, I prefer flambés to winter stews." mockup

"When it's extremely cold out, I prefer flambés to winter stews."

from $19.00

"You never call, and the federal government will back me up on that."

"You never call, and the federal government will back me up on that." mockup

"You never call, and the federal government will back me up on that."

from $19.00

All You Can Eat Buffet: "Remember, my safe word is 'Diabetes.'"

All You Can Eat Buffet: "Remember, my safe word is 'Diabetes.'" mockup

All You Can Eat Buffet: "Remember, my safe word is 'Diabetes.'"

from $19.00

"I'll get the onion soup... it's the only thing on the menu that I don't know why it's bad for me!"

"I'll get the onion soup... it's the only thing on the menu that I don't know why it's bad for me!" mockup

"I'll get the onion soup... it's the only thing on the menu that I don't know why it's bad for me!"

from $19.00

"Welcome to the neighbourhood. I hope you like savory pies."

"Welcome to the neighbourhood. I hope you like savory pies." mockup

"Welcome to the neighbourhood. I hope you like savory pies."

from $19.00

'Of course they're not working. You're not supposed to have appetite suppressants for dessert.'

'Of course they're not working. You're not supposed to have appetite suppressants for dessert.' mockup

'Of course they're not working. You're not supposed to have appetite suppressants for dessert.'

from $19.00

"I know the schools are great, but is this really the house we want to ride out the apocalypse in?"

"I know the schools are great, but is this really the house we want to ride out the apocalypse in?" mockup

"I know the schools are great, but is this really the house we want to ride out the apocalypse in?"

from $19.00

How melanoma researchers take family summer vacations.

How melanoma researchers take family summer vacations. mockup

How melanoma researchers take family summer vacations.

from $19.00

'I don't know what it is...I just have this funny feeling like I'm being followed.'

'I don't know what it is...I just have this funny feeling like I'm being followed.' mockup

'I don't know what it is...I just have this funny feeling like I'm being followed.'

from $19.00

'Two more strawberry creams and that's my ' five a day' taken care of....'

'Two more strawberry creams and that's my ' five a day' taken care of....' mockup

'Two more strawberry creams and that's my ' five a day' taken care of....'

from $19.00

'Don't open that attachment!'

from $19.00

Food-Snob Fear Factor

from $19.00

"Geoffrey's a bit worried about Lyme disease."

"Geoffrey's a bit worried about Lyme disease." mockup

"Geoffrey's a bit worried about Lyme disease."

from $19.00

"...And never take candy from strangers -- They might be spies!"

"...And never take candy from strangers -- They might be spies!" mockup

"...And never take candy from strangers -- They might be spies!"

from $19.00

"All our devices are talking to each other - about me."

"All our devices are talking to each other - about me." mockup

"All our devices are talking to each other - about me."

from $19.00

It occurred to Norman that he was using far, far too much salt.

It occurred to Norman that he was using far, far too much salt. mockup

It occurred to Norman that he was using far, far too much salt.

from $19.00

Paranoid Eater Gifts Collection

Paranoid Eater Mugs

Browse our collection of mugs specially designed for paranoid eaters—combining humor and personality in every sip, these mugs make a delightful gift or treat for yourself.

Paranoid Eater Pillows

Explore cozy pillows with funny paranoid eater graphics—ideal for anyone who loves to add a lighthearted touch to their living space.

Paranoid Eater Prints

Discover eye-catching prints that humorously showcase the cautious eating lifestyle. Perfect for brightening up kitchens or dining rooms with a dash of wit.

Paranoid Eater T-Shirts

Find the perfect witty t-shirt for the paranoid eater in your life. Our humorous designs celebrate their cautious approach with style and smile-inducing humor.