Paradoxical Pairer Pillows

"Have you a cabernet that will pair well with dysfunction?"

"Listen to this: 'Technology reduces the time we spend on a given task, but increases the number of tasks we're expected to do.' Sounds like a no-win situation to me!"

Optimist

"Ok... for today I want a 500-word essay on what you know about nothing."

Large, wrinkly

"This may surprise some of your viewers, but I didn't actually want to go into the box."

WANTED Dead or Alive - Schrodinger's Cat.

"I have good news and bad news about your cat, Dr Schrodinger..."

Schrödinger and his cat

"Believe me when I tell you that I'm not that honest."

"What's important is that we learn from what we must never admit happened."

Another Time Travel Pair o' Ducks.

Sharing the Bed with Zeno

"Pregnant!... How did that happen? We took precautions, like not having sex!"

"Oh my God, help! Is there a logician on board?!"

"Most people forget they've had amnesia."

"Not until you've arranged your pillows."

"The central digital platform is temporarily renamed Project Schrödinger’s Cat. Until it is accessed on the 24th February it both is and is not a working system."

Two guns are pointing at each other in a peace sign.

Inventing Time Travel

Energy Conservation Be Damned. Fred constantly prepared for Global Warming and Nuclear Winter to happen at the same time.

Schrodinger's Cat Litter Box

Schrodinger's kittens

"Experimental 'no government' zone next 200 miles—by order of Trump!"

Shrodinger's cat: I may or many not be missing.

"If someone tells you they lied, they are probably telling the truth."

"What the?! Have you read about the Schrodinger's cat paradox? That's really twisted dude!"

307 days without an accident.

"Dig deep! C'mon! You got this!"

"If it's stupid but works, it isn't stupid."

Department of Homeland Insecurity