Paradise Parody Appreciator Pillows

'Thank you for calling the Pearly Gates.. your prayers are important to us and may be monitored for training purposes.'

Madonna of the Pukes.

"Who's got the hammer?"

"Relax. I just had a vitamin."

"Well, what did you expect? They were both missing vital organs."

"Canadian Mt. ‘Rush’more"

Trump! The Musical

'Oh, it's a long, long time...From here to November...'

Night of the Zombonies.

'This guy loves giving stump speeches. Ironically, they're all against deforestation.'

"Steamed vegetables."

Don Quixote is Caged (Don Quixote).

"Whoa. Jeff. Looks like you got that job at the cosmetic testing lab."

"Who plays ball with the Dalai Lama?" "That's right." "What's right?" "Who plays ball with the Dalai Lama." "Why are you asking me?"

"Move ten paces, turn, then fire. Ready?" "Dibs on the hat."

"After the drugstore, I need you to find fresh parmesan."

'Oh Hi!'

"We didn't want to know the gender in advance."

"Hugh fans!"

'The boss said I never made any profits and I never found customers worth mentioning and that's why he promoted me to the company's chief bad example!'

'This one is for serving 27 years in the military without anyone finding out I'm gay.'

The Greek Trampoline

Admit it. We have a drinking problem.

Can't Touch This

"Amateurs."

'It's cutting edge theatre.'

Russia Money Laundering

'...And now, the film most criticized for eroding traditional family values, the nominees are...'