Parachuting Satirist Gifts

Parachute Mandates Are Murder!

'According to our statistics department, 78.93 of the statistics they produce are worthless.'

Indian rajah rowing elephant in a monsoon flood.

Wolf Danny With "Random""The work must be tantamount to mayhem. Making an insatiable public confused, indifferent, annoyed—this is the premise on which rests my deliberately vacuous oeuvre."

"Too 'Book of Genesis'?"

"Gee, thanks pal."

'Think how all that chatting is affecting global warming.'

"Is it me, or is Jasper Johns a genius?" "Über-genius, Larry. Über!"

"This cruise is getting a very stern review from me, I can tell you."

Welcome to Mauritius Home of the Dodo Burger

Dawing your Cellphone

Sock Puppet in Literature

"Actually, it's more like a mouse race."

Non-Creative Writing, Also Known as Plagiarism 101.

"So, like, don't make any big plans for this weekend."

"I see the White House didn't lower the flag to half staff."

"I condensed my painting to the pure essence of the message. What helps me a lot is the fact that I've got nothing to say at all."

'He doesn't like people walking in - try crawling.'

'Mr. Dunbarter, your fantasy that 'greed is good' may be a case of economic insanity.'

'I don't think the employees like me.'

"That's not a knife crime initiative. That's a knife crime initiative!"

"I'm starting my own movement—Occupy Fifty-Seventh Street."

'Flight simulator'

"I swear, Mr. Drumpf, I meant it in the best sense of the word." "Mr. Drumpf is a moron."

Looks Like They're Finally Renovating The Toilet

German School

Plight of Decent-White-Male-Middle Class Scapgoats.

"What are you doing?"

Bank P45's - 'Cashier number 5 please.'

"You can't offend me. I never mix religion or politics with reality."

The Quack Quack Diaries: The George Broderick Diaries

Man with dollar sign on his t-shirt.

The Evolution Of Man

I know it seems a bit misplaced, but it does pay all the wedding expenses !'

'Yeah, he was a good boss, and we'll miss him. Somebody kick his briefcase down there, too.'