Parachute Pro Gifts

'Next time the captain says to turn off your cell phone, just do it!'

Acme Skydiving School.

'Hello - I've been parachuted in to save the bank.'

A newborn parachutes to safety after the stork carrying him gets hit by a plane.

Very Difficult Conversations

Broomstick crash.

'I count only four parachutes. Where's Mr. Simms?'

'Let's try it once without the parachute.'

Parachuting bishop.

I'm a paralegal, it's like a flying doctor, only it's about law.

Cupid and parachutists.

Now hiring.

Blind man sky diving with his guide dog.

Felix suddenly remembers what the string on his finger is a reminder of.

"They have special forces, but we have policy reports!"

'Could you throw me the car keys?'

'I have a connection to make.'

Lemmings jumping off a cliff and one has a parachute.

What's your exit strategy?

'I knew I should have bought more insurance.'

The Reindeer Got a Better Gig

'My boyfriend is meeting me when I hit the ground.'

Did You Know That...Parachutes could soon be made of spiders' webs, the fibres being stronger than steel?

'Dinner at 11 o'clock.' 'Roger that.'

Airplanes have to limit the noise pollution at landing

'Oh, so that's where I put my bear.'

'Well? How was the flight?'

'Check... weapons... maps... house-wife... clean underwear...'

"On reflection, it might be prudent to leave this one till last..."

"If at first you don't succeed, give up skydiving."

"I didn't care for the movie either."

Swinging through the jungle.

"So good to be out of that flying death trap."

'Come on! You only live once!'

Bad luck