Paperwork Pessimist Gifts

'Mr. McWit, being self employed in a one person operation, would you care to explain these deductions for employee theft?'

'All these stupid forms! -- You self-employed guys make me sick!'

'Well, there should be someplace on the form where a person can explain why he's withholding some of his taxes to protest something.'

A paperwork machine spews endless paperwork

"You've got to fill in these forms to join the 'How to reduce bureaucracy' seminar."

In/Out/These Things Happen.

Quality Control

'Today is the tomorrow I feared yesterday. . .'

Worry tank

'Ms Simpson, I believe I've finally done it. I've written the Great American Memo.'

Innovation tray covered in ivy.

"Do you think we should look again at who we invite to these meetings?"

Arthur Schopenhauer

Smoke and mirrors.

"Son, the world is full of disappointments. About 7.7 billion of them."

Forms I cannot deal with / Forms I will not deal with

IN OUT UP DOWN AND ALL AROUND

Untold Love Stories. The Shadow and Pollyanna. It's no use, Lamont, you know what evil lurks in the hearts of men and I believe there's good in everybody.

In, Out, Complain.

"I told my manager that I couldn't cope with the endless mind numbing paperwork. I said I'd had enough of the bureaucracy, that I had to get out."

Cat and INOUT boxes.

'We finally do have meaningful tax reform, sir. This year's form is printed on recycled paper.'

"Show me a man who's optimistic about the human race..."

Platitudes for the hopelessly realistic. When life gives you lemons, get a gift receipt.

"Have you ever had one of those days when it would have been easier just to do some work?"

"Stress is often associated with feelings of 'isolation'...It's really important that you see yourself as valued, as useful!"

It's a big misconception. Everyone thinks hell is all fire. Actually, it's all paperwork.'

The glass is half full. - '' - 'The glass is half empty' - '' - 'Gah!! No clean glasses!!' - '' -

Editor. Short. Sweet.

Trays 'IN' 'OUT' and 'Don't ask'

"Today, in all aspects of life losses outnumbered gains."

See District Directors

"A pessimist thinks that we've already arrived."

Desk boxes - sublimeridiculous.

Prison Governor - Trays read: In/Not if I have my way.