Papercraft Fan Gifts

A Reasonable Time to Give Your Travel Agent a Call

'The wheel was great, but what have you done for me lately?'

'So let me see if I've got it straight. It was a very large squirrel and your husband is a nut.'

"Frankly, now that he's an obnoxious teenager, I find it more and more difficult to muster the urge to protect him..."

"Think of it as twenty one in human years. I'll take a bourbon and toilet water."

Clown teaches how to speak Jibberish

"The fish sticks here are very good."

"Renk just discovered beard oil."

"All I do is swim and eat plankton, but do I lose weight?"

"It's not the persistent lack of sunlight or freezing temperatures that bother me - it's the crowds I can't stand."

"Of all the buildings I've designed, it's probably the most handsome."

"All natural snow cones for sale."

'Been Away?' A piece of bread looks at a piece of brown toast as if it's got a suntan.

The Runaway Horse

'Dogs are so silly: Just throw a ball or a stick and they'll chase it and bring it back!'

'Charlie is the first to admit that he's too old for me.'

"Well, what did you expect? They were both missing vital organs."

'Are you made of sugar?'

'So where do you think pineapple juice comes from?'

The Ferocious Viking Wiener Dog

'Your shoe's untied.'

Stoneage puncture repair kit...

King Henry and his Cheshire bride

This is a 'text book' it's a bit like a website but printed on paper.

'I believe we've located the cause of your back problem, Mrs. Kangaroo.'

'You can just forget about the cake.'

'Do you think that's wise?'

'So tell me why you think you're suffering from seasonal ineffective disorder.'

Support group for sheep.

"My, grandma, what a big nose you have! Let's take a little off the sides."

Dog walking Human.

"NOW can I shoot you out of a cannon?"

'Originally he was the mascot until we discovered he had a golden foot.'

The Seven Dwarfs After Therapy

Meet the Enemy