Paper Piler Gifts

A man jumps on a pile of papers in the Data Comprestion Unit.

Lunch.

"As I see it, our only out is to apply for not-for-profit status."

"Yes Sir, I'm still working on the 'ins and outs' of their proposal."

Tick-tock, tick-tock, tick-tock, tick-tick, tock-tock, tickety-tick tock ….

"I feel your pain."

"We've misjudged the tapas again."

Research and Development: Now, Never.

Tree Funeral

In Tray, Out Tray, and Shredded Paper Tray

'IN--IGNORE--OUT'

'Yes, your papers seem to have lots of citations, but I've checked: They're all self-citations...'

'Sir, I've got a computer to avoid a giant mess but unfortunately I can't find the computer in this giant mess!'

'Sometimes I wonder what I's do without you!'

'We've got to upgrade our computer system. Downloading information on this one takes too long.'

'Nothing serious. I just hate my job.'

IRS agent to lady: 'Your refund was delayed because of shredded paperwork ... but we're putting it all together with red tape.'

Security Dept. Keep. Out.

"I get the feeling you're still keeping a lot of yourself inside."

"Let's just get through the first aisle...then we'll discuss your impulse buying."

"What a coincidence, this letter complaining about our paper mill polluting the river is written on notepaper printed there...."

"Why couldn't you be a doctor's note or a legal document like your brother?"

"Wait, I have to get my papers AND I have to do paperwork?!"

Crumpled pieces of paper form the shape of a Christmas tree.

Full'pending' tray at Apathy Institute

'Every month put a little money away and at the end of the year . . . you'll be surprised how little you have.'

"What do you mean, 'There's too much paper work'? We're a paper mill, for Pete's sake!"

Log in, paper out.

'I guess it's time to do some filing.'

'...and we've converted this room into a home office.'

'Hold on, I'll see if I can find a piece of paper.'

A fairly heavy week of junk mail.

"You said it was OK to make our office more like home. Well, this is how I live at home."

Efficient employee.

'02 days without a paper cut.'