Pandemic Comic Relief Pillows

"It's vaccinate, not evacuate!!"

A child builds a snowman with a Coronavirus head

"I ran out of masks and the dog didn't need this anymore, so. . ."

Covid Back to School

"Oooh... Look, honey. Scarlet macaws! You know, they mate for life." "That's what you think."

Overjumpers

Look! Up in the sky! It's absurd! It's inane! It's Malaprop Man! Malaprop Man, I hear you're fighting climate change now. Yes starting with solo panels, I'm reducing greenhouse guesses! I'm investing in buttery technology. I'm going to have windmeals. And of course, I've stopped drinking cola. Why is that? I'll have a smaller carbonated footprint!

"We are gathered here to morn the passing of Bob Opossum."

The Official Covid-19 Diet

"Yes, three of a kind beats two pair."

"Dammit Harold, you know I hate that mask!"

"It says here on your resume that one of your qualities is a sense of humor. Care to elaborate?"

"Saving Lois Lane a dozen times doesn't mean you can claim her as a dependent on your taxes."

"What kind of sinker are you using?!"

'I think my teacher has a crush on me. She's holding me back for another year.'

Tourist in the desert

Break Glass in Case of Stress

The trap

'I can't say I like your cavalier attitude Benson.'

'Let's face it...We have irreconcilable differences!'

"On the plus side, you're on the cover of all the major business publications."

'On Company Time: A Novel'

Of course I've not dusted - You know I favour a matt finish!'

"Use your words, Jefferson! Not a roundhouse to the face!"

"I used to waste a lot of time explaining myself to family, friends and shrinks. Now I only explain myself to Rick."

Maybe next tiime you'll hand in the risk assessment on time

'I must be getting good, because my Dad told me to go play for the neighbours!'

"You've got pussyfooting from 10 to 11, shilly-shallying until 12, then hemming and hawing the rest of the afternoon."

'Nothing to worry about, Mr. Jenkins, some people do have a mild reaction to the flu shot!'

"Having captions above makes me feel like I'm doing grand opera."

'Sorry, but I don't think you're right for our company.'

'I don't want bread crumbs. I'd prefer some money to buy a cheeseburger.'

'I went online to check out my ancestry and I found that my dad, 10,000 times removed, was an amoeba!'

'Oh, we don't need your references. We got hackers for that.'

Welcome to California. You may begin your Schwarzenegger imitation now