Palm Reading Aficionado T-Shirts

"You like people and people respond to that."

A desert island with a knotted palm tree

"Yep, I've read this chapter before."

Asking out a palm reader.

Man enters a palm reading establishment carrying a tropical plant.

"This paw has you meeting a lovely poodle, an enchantress who will win your heart... but look, here, this is telling me she's lousy with fleas."

'Oh, no - I have to read each tentacle - that'll be extra, of course.'

Santa Claus You Are Welcome.

"I'm not sure you'll want to know this."

'See you in two weeks!'

'I'm sorry, Madam Zola. I'm afraid you no longer have second sight.'

Paw readings

"You will meet a tall, mysterious stranger — you will rub fur on his pant leg."

Vista Acres - A tanned community.

Ill next Thursday

'I really don't know how you got here with your life line!'

'You've got dry scalp.'

Man sees 'Palm Readings and Stock Projections' business window

"This one has nicer sand, but I think I prefer the tree on the last one we saw."

"Gas, is it the future?"

Amateur Palmist

Thank You For Not Asking If I's enjoying My First Vacation in 20 Years.

"I see you naked. A beautiful young woman is leaning over you... Oh, hang on. She's performing your autopsy."

"The fact that you're here means you will continue to make poor life decisions."

"I see you coming into money, at least 50p for a cup of tea."

Man visits palm reader with 'Doing Anything Tonight?' written on his hands.

"Your food line is nice and long, and - oh, my - your squirrel line is all over the place."

'Fortunes, Impressions, Hunches, Wild Guesses'

Closed for the Foreseeable Future

"Out today due to foreseen circumstances."

'Stranger?.. No, it's definitely a tall, dark strangler.'

Fortune teller describes to angler the size of the fish he's going to catch.

'I see you're not wearing clean underpants.'

'That line means good managerial skills!'