Paella Enthusiast T-Shirts

Paella

"My dad says we eat honey 'cause it has lots of vitamin Bee."

6 Brothers Falafel

"Would you relax? All you guys are so tense. I just wanted to tell you to your face how enigmatic I find you."

Punt Cake

'Hello, Acme signs? This is the Berger & Coles Law Office...'

"When you say the meek will inherit the earth, does that include the mineral rights?"

'Protein, starch, vegetable??? When you said 'square meal' I thought PIZZA IN A BOX!'

"Why don't you ever fetch anything good like a pizza?"

"Petting zoo" "Heavy petting zoo"

"A whack, whack here. A whack, whack there. Here a whack, there a whack. Everywhere a whack, whack."

"Nuts to you, too."

"Pizza sounds wonderful. Italian, Greek or Hipster?"

'I'd like two pizzas, one with cheese and pepperoni and the other with cheese and sausage. One more thing, do you deliver?'

"Privates Beach"

"Not to brag or anything, but I'm the elephant in the room at my company."

"When portions are this huge, I eat half now and the rest in a few minutes."

"The rolling wheels...the ringing bells...signal the deliciousness of summer."

The americanisation of vulture.

AA Meeting Here Today

'It's my favorite.'

"I’ve heard of them barking at the moon, but never scatting at the sun."

"I stand corrected."

Italia tours

"When the company announced that they're gonna move our retirement accounts down to Mexico, I was like '401 Que Pasa?'"

'Another neat trick is to cut regular spaghetti into little pieces, and next thing you know you've got yourself a bowl of spaghetti-i-s.'

New Flavors at Where's the Scoop Ice Cream

"Didn't you just say that?"

"Fresh pepper spray?"

'What kind of alteration did you have in mind?'

Businessman sees sign in window of 'Fred's Chili Bowl' restaurant: 'Now Hiring a Bean Counter'.

"Let me now direct your attention to the pepperoni."

"You have word-ill."

Children playing games

Two vending machines for fisherman: 'Live Bait' next to 'Dead as a Doornail Bait'