Pachyderm Enthusiast Gifts

'If we allow him to share our bed only once, be prepared to put up with him every night!'

Geek fairies

Free speech isn't cheap!

Intellectual Property

"Welcome to the guitar family! Is this all of us? Heck, no! We're just the ones his wife knows about. You'll meet the rest later."

"Have you been scratching this?"

PJ Parties

'It's a silent protest.'

Roadkill Restaurant

"Nobody loved little William Poopy-Pants."

Injured? I told you so but you didn't listen

'Actually, what makes you think I suffer from insufficiency syndrome?'

"So how's that math grade looking? What's the team GPA this year?"

The Signwriter's Strike Enters It's 2nd Week

"For goodness sake, Wilf, trim your eyebrows -- they think you're one of them!"

'Was the interview too early for you?'

"I love the smell of lip balm in the morning."

40 minutes in this position

Turandot

Times Square

Botox would be pure overkill.

'A word of advice: Don't ever try to sting a pachyderm...'

'The poor guy's allergic to sand.'

At Times the Term "Joystick" Was a Misnomer.

Billy strip: Billy prefers video games to girls.

The Bonze interrupts Madam Butterfly's wedding

Jester with scratch cards. "I need to win some money to fund my arts project."

Every Christmas Ned would regift. . . this year was the most challenging yet!!

'Are you role-playing or have you brought more ghastly pyjamas?'

'I'll call you back. I'm sleepwalking.'

'Are you guys having a pyjama party?'

Damn Seagulls

"Splendid pixels!"