Billboard Enthusiast Gifts

Injured? I told you so but you didn't listen

Times Square

"Hoskins, try saying 'profits are up' without the finger quotes, okay?"

"Great plan. Could we get some more details?"

man fishing at a dock sees a billboard: Do You Know It's Anniversary

'Now this is exactly what I was referring to when I talked about 'scope creep'.'

"I will now fend off questions from the audience."

Around here it got a little tricky...

"Joe's cereal. NPR co-approved."

Thank You, Goals Achieved... and then some!

As Seen Watching TV

F1 - Quit Smoking.

I am billing, therefore I am.

Office Furniture - Would you like to thump the table sir, to hear what it sounds like?

This Space Available.

A bill poster pasting up a wanted poster of himself.

"Satan's on the line, sir. He says the soul you sent doesn't look like the one in the ad."

Company take-over bid

"All power to the board of directors!"

'I like this new alcohol labelling.'

"The Closer, Cleaner, Smoother Reaper."

'Well, it looks like the 'yea' has it.'

Eat More Salted Nuts

'You'll be happy to know there's nothing wrong with you. That will be four thousand, three hundred and eighty two dollars.'

DRINK LAFARGE'S ALE, 'He's trying his best to balance tyhe budget.'

"I've got to admit I'm not crazy about the freeway."

Before we begin tonight's dream, a word from our sponsor...

Advertising hoarding proposing marriage (which is rejected).

'This is Phillips. He's our new idea man.'

'Thank you for picking me as your ATM machine...but before I dispense your money, here's a word from Ed's Bar & Grill...'

"Welcome to Illinois: Land of America's lowest credit rating!"

'It doesn't matter if you win or lose: it's how much face time you can generate on the 6 o'clock news.'

"She's a little overworked but, depending on what happens next Sunday, I'll probably jump back on."

'I can't believe they're using my mantra to sell beer.'

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