Over-researcher Gifts

'I disagree with you, doctor. It's not just a hangnail. According to the Internet, it's a rare genetic disorder. . .'

"Ya know, 'DUH' can be a very hurtful word."

"Do you want to play doctorate?"

The Jeopardy of Progress

Pounding speeds up the computer.

'... And some primitive cultures, believed that 'the great ones' modelled us from clay.'

Enhanced Pedophilia Interrogation Techniques

"My older self travels back just to remind me to put the cap back on this pen?"

"Bark or stare? Always a tough decision. Bark? Maybe stare? Whimper? Maybe? Meanwhile, stare."

'I remember when you used to look for answers using your astute powers of deduction.'

2021

Remote control pirate bully

'Dr.Sall Thompson got so excited over the new spring design she took a quantum leap!'

Circa 1928, The Reese's Candy laboratory.

Valuable business advice from some famous disruptive technologies.

UK/US Free Trade Deal

Though he created more than 300 products from peanuts, George Washington Carver was unable to change even one of them back into a peanut.

"Finally, after years of work, irrefutable proof that I'm a nerd."

"No, I didn't steal your content. I just have your content's doppleganger."

"Would you like me to annotate that for you?"

Fear/Knowledge

Typical Brain Versus Einstein's Brain

"We're bringing the arts and sciences together here by giving crayons to mice."

'According to our statistics department, 78.93 of the statistics they produce are worthless.'

My Bookshelf Before the Internet

"She's done it! The formula for work-life balance!"

Wally Begins research for his thesis entitled "who's a good dog?"

"You're going to have to submit to peer review eventually, Bradshaw!"

"Finches, don't look now, but there's a creepy guy staring at our beaks."

Stan Mack's Real Life Funnies: The Science of Love

Molecular Biology and Cosmology buildings

"Not only pharmaceuticals - we're also finding all sorts of industrial chemicals here."

"Meet the scribe"

Burning the midnight oil.

Academic Jeopardy ... 'What Was the Maiden Name of Dante Alighieri's Maternal Grandmother?'