Outerwear Collector T-Shirts

It's not unusual to have a coat on your tongue, Mr. Fusco. What I do find strange is the Chesterfield collar.

'I love shopping for clothing I don't need with money I don't have.'

Joe had kept the same suit for thirty-five years!

"My scoop-back tank comes in Mango, Morning Glory, and Scallion. Don's Maori surfers are available in Iris, Mustard, and Prawn."

"Mmm...'ll take these - they fit like a glove."

Fake fur coat and no knickers

It's a see through nightie...that magnifies!

I love my cape

"I predict that men's fashions will remain relatively stable throughout the next century and a half, whereas women's will evolve continuously, and with the speed and illogic of a juiced-up tribe of rampaging Darwinian monkeys."

"Long Johns Silver."

'You've got me all wrong, baby. I don't want to touch your sweater...I want to eat it.'

Goggles? Yes, he's a" windshield viper"!

"Ah, sweatpants."

'Don't worry, if you buy it, you don't have to wear it.'

"No this is timeless classic menswear appreciation. Hipster beatnik is Tuesday nights."

Retail store: 'put this on and shut up!'

"It was a crime of fashion."

Bad Outfit Alarm.

"Psst. . . fancy shoe sales are down. Can you make Crocs instead?"

Wooly mammoth. Polyester Mammoth.

Campaign for real beer bellies.

She can never resist another pair of shoes...

"Mom! Are these capri pants, or did I just get taller?"

I Can Smell BeerI can Smell Fear.

'I went to the Shirt Fanciers Convention and all I got was this shirt!'

'Well this is awkward.'

'Where do you buy your clothes, Frodo?' 'Erm, Orcsfam, Gandalf. Orcsfam.'

I have a press for every day of the year!

'I see you've gone digital.'

Soulmates.

'I have a dress for every day of the year. Is that it?'

Shopkeeper thinks a fashionable man's delicate umbrella is a lady's parasol.

Pregnant lady's shirt says 'Baby' with arrow pointing to tummy, Husband's shirt says 'Blubber' with arrow pointing to tummy

I don't look like much, but I'm going to inherit the earth.

"I see you bought more of these! Must you live up to your name, Mittens?"