Outdoor Parks Ponderer Gifts

"Excuse me, but are you going to pick up after your dog?"

Wildlife

'You must be Jim's new gardener. I'm his neighbour, Gerald. Had any luck with the Petunias this year? Aren't those Jim's feet sticking out of the ornamental pond?'

Water Gardening: One thing is certain - you will find the peace and tranquility of water an almost irresistible attraction.

Frog to other frog: 'Hey, nice pad.'

'Thanks, we really appreciate this. Yeah, the middle button. Don't worry, it's auto-focus - just aim and shoot.'

But there are other pleasures still for the fisherman's delight....for nature is everywhere about him.

Beginning Yarder.

"This blood knot ought to be re-named the blood, sweat and tears knot."

Business Duck

"I can't wait to start growing limbs so that I can use a tablet..."

'My horoscope said I was going to make someone happy today.'

'Our basic package is no frills, no chew toys, no extra Kibbles, and narry a pat on the head from management...'

Don't you worry JB, everything is fine here.

'I'll say this for you young Thoreu - he certainly does make good use of his pond.'

Six frogs leap off their lily pads.

How do you fell about buying your own health insurance?

'Its that final touch that makes it seem just like a natural pond.'

Painter removes 'wet paint' sign from park bench and replaces it with a 'dry paint' sign.

'Remember when the authorities were notified when we were spotted? Now nobody cares. They think we're drones.'

"Hey, Brian. I can't make it to the park today, but I'll be there in spirit."

"Apparently, over two-thirds of the Earth's surface is covered with water!"

'No, I'm not into astronomy. That telescope is for you to see your new parking spot.'

Vernal Pond: Here today. . . gone tomorrow.

"It's nice to see John finally relaxing."

'It's so embarrassing. My mother had my tadpole tail bronzed!'

Water Gardening: And you will find yourself thinking over many garden problems at the waterside.

"Read me back the minutes from the last dip."

"You're right! It is much easier to explain it this way!"

Philosophy of Forestry: 'How much wood would a woodchuck chuck, if a woodchuck could chuck wood? Walt? Roger? Steve? Anyone?'

'I'm just not feeling sufficiently incentivised today.'

'OK, you wanted to shoot a game of pool and I wanted to lay by the pool. The main thing is that we're here together.'

"Why don't you paint a picture – it'll last longer."