Organizational Humor Fans Pillows

Things that don't spark joy

'I hope you're not threatened by powerful women, because you're fired.'

"Bert, I'm confused. What happens after we circle the wagons, tighten our belts and walk a mile in our customer's shoes? Is that when the chickens come home to roost?"

"The good news is you’re the only one we’re not firing ... the bad news is you’re the only one to run the department."

"We need to make some cuts. We'll start with integrity, accountability, openness, and transparency."

"I don't like getting bogged down in details. I'm more of a big-picture guy."

'OK, team, let's review: when the arrow goes down, it means...?

'I'll make my final decision on that promotion of yours, after this game.'

Can do...No can do

"Don't forget to leave me a wakeup call so I can get the worm!"

"Fill out an application? Can't I just text it?"

"I think I'll be late back for tea. . . about a week."

"He's not really much of a leader...he just has a lot of followers."

"I can motivate everyone except myself."

He was destined for greatness. Whatever that meant.

The Rubber Ball Company

"Here, we do not procrastinate, we 'table' things."

Organization is not rocket science!

'Negotiations have reached an impasse, legal recommends we resort to violence.'

"Does anyone here have a clue what it is we used to get?"

'Marsha, did you file the Peterson account on the cumulus, stratus, cirrus, or nimbus cloud?'

"To address this mistake we must be professional and use root-cause analysis. I'll start by saying it's not my fault...."

A secretary at a desk with a nameplate the says Dot Com.

Executive ignores wet floor warning and slides down hall

"It's crazy here! They're all on recreational rugs."

The Department of Mystery - No one really knows who we are or what we do, including us.

Woman holds report: 'This has so many different fonts in it, I thougt it was a ransom note.'

"I always like to clear my desk off for the weekend."

'My team likes to see me spring into action.'

Dog's In Tray and Out Tray

"Good news. It's a small pig."

'Why are you arguing? The customer is always right, you know! 'But he called you a crook!'

Quality Control

'By the time I climbed up to this job, I was too tired to do it.'

"A few years ago, you management gurus told us to downsize until the halls echoed..."