Order In The Court Aficionado T-Shirts

'I'd better start on your appeal.'

'My client has asked to sit in your chair. He says it looks more comfortable.'

'Am I being too suspicious or do you think it's possible that they're crooked?'

"Your Honor, we're going to go with the prosecution's spin."

'I request an postponement, Your Honor -- I have to study for my bar exams.'

I love Lawyers

"Judgement Day: Division Four"

Ruth Bader Ginsburg - Forever Supreme

'Normally, I hate a rush to judgement - but I'm doing this case pro bono.'

'Wow! I never before saw such a strenuous objection.'

"I've learned something in this trial. My firm needs to hire that prosecutor."

"I object!" "Overruled!"

"This is my client's videotaped deposition—please be considerate and rewind after viewing."

"The prosecution shall stop referring to the defendant as 'the alleged, totally guilty as sin guy'."

"Well, heck! If all you smart cookies agree, who am I to dissent?"

Los Angeles' New Smart Meters

"In a just world we'd have 'No Lawyer Left Behind'."

The Birth of a Lawsuit

'The Grand Jury doesn't understand me...'

"I've asked you not to overrule me in front of the children."

'Don't blame the lawyer!'

'The highest court in the land.'

"...And the court awards you twenty five thousand for the loss of faculty in your right arm."

'My client has required the services of countless law enforcement, court, penal and probation personnel. He's not a menace...he's a jobs creator!'

They Are Not Going to Take Me

'Ignorance of the law is no excuse, dummy!'

Say what? Johnnie Cochran died in 2005?

'At first it was a few dollars here and a few dollars there. Then I realized I'd have to pay my lawyer.'

"Haven't you ever heard of the first amendment?"

'Every day, I'm suing better and better...'

"I was caught and released. But according to news reports, I remain a fish of interest."

RBG, RGB, CMYK

"Give a man a fish, he'll eat for a day. Teach a man to sue, and he'll eat for a lifetime."

Criminal Stupidness

'Sorry, but I do not recall that incident either.'